Week 20 - Dec 21st - Merry Christmas!

It was a whirlwind of a week and I could hardly wait for Christmas for Scott to open his surprise! I know he was going to be so excited! He was definitely not expecting it and it was a bit comical. Scott is colorblind and so when he opened the gift from Baby Jolley, he wasn't sure he was looking at a pink outfit. It was a little shirt and pants that said 50% mommy, 50% daddy but I had to point out the picture before he figured it out! I was so proud of myself to be able to pull that off as he was seriously not thinking we knew the sex yet. I had told him on Christmas Eve that the Dr. didn't do the ultrasound (which he didn't!). He had sent me flowers that day with a note saying how excited he was to find out what the baby was and I had to call him and fib a bit. That just about did me in but I hung in one more day. What a wonderful time to be able to celebrate our Savior's birth. I'm finally feeling well and able to have family here to enjoy this season. (We were a little disappointed that the snow we received a few weeks ago had mostly melted and it really didn't snow enough to be able to take the kids sledding. And we were playing flu roulette as I think by the end of the week, just about all of us suffered a one to two day stomach flu that put us completely out of commission! So sorry to our San Diego'ns!)

But I have so much to be grateful for. Mostly for our Savior, Jesus Christ and his gifts of love and sacrifice we all have around us everyday! And for our Heavenly Father who has unconditional love for us all! This pregnancy has grown my testimony that He does loves us and knows us and our needs. I've learned that He does hear our prayers and sometimes the answer is "No", and sometimes the answer is "Not Now". I'm grateful for my wonderful husband who is such a kind, wonderful man and who is also my best friend. I'm grateful for my beautiful little boy Jackson who makes the world a better and interesting place to be. And despite this awful economy, we are blessed to have a home to keep us warm, the income from our jobs and enough for our needs. The blessings are endless!

Merry Christmas everyone!

Week 19 - Dec 14th - IT'S A ....!

(Dec 17 ultrasound)

I was waiting to post this weeks update as it was to be a surprise. My husband, from the time we found out we were pregnant, has been so excited, to say the least. With all the craziness at the beginning, I wasn't wanting to tell many people too soon because I was so afraid of miscarrying. The cautionary part of me was thinking "what are the chances after 14 years of marriage to conceive for the first time, AND carry the baby full term?!" All of my SIL's have miscarried at least once and I was worried of that happening. Well, when the first trimester was over and I was ready to spill the beans, I found that he couldn't stand not telling our friends and ward members. I would start to tell our news and they would then say, "Oh, yeah, Scott told us you were expecting!". Of course, I'm overjoyed that he is so happy for this and he is such a great dad. But it took the fun out of sharing our news!

Another factor was everyone's predictions on what the baby was going to be. Not one person thought it would be a boy. When I told my good friend Vicky, she said, "It's going to be a girl and I can see her now, red curly hair (we have red on both sides) and in a little white outfit with pink rosebuds!" Wow, really!? And as soon as I told Scott about the positive pregnancy test, he said, "It's going to be a girl!". And Jackson has been referring to the baby as SHE or HER and says it will be a girl because we already have a boy - him! And many others were saying, "You're going to get your girl!" Honestly, at the beginning, I was in so much shock that all I could think was, I hope I can carry this baby and I don't care what it is as long as it's healthy. But the more and more girl predictions came, I started getting my heart set on a girl. I was the only girl with four brothers and although I'm good with boys, I was getting a bit excited to think of having a baby girl. And then thinking of names, I knew right away what we would name a girl but could not for the life of me settle on a boys name. We knew we would name our first boy Jackson years before we found out we were getting him. But I was struggling with another boys name. When I told Scott I think I might be dissappointed if it's a boy, he started telling me he then thought it was a boy, ...and all along I know he is hoping for a girl.

So as the time came closer to when we could find out the gender, I decided this was going to be MY secret. The appointment was set for Dec 17th, and because I try and plan my appointments for when Jackson is in preschool, Scott has only been to one and not at the one when this was scheduled. So when he would ask when the appointment was, I was giving him very vague answers and even told him once it was on Christmas Eve. Then I was planning on buying a outfit that I could wrap and give to him on Christmas from "Baby Jolley" with the gender ultrasound picture in it. Funny thing is, when I went to get an outfit, I only picked up a baby girl one - wishful thinking.

I don't know if every expectant mother or father is as excited as we were to find out the gender and I would never have been one of those who doesn't find out! Considering our circumstances, we could hardly contain ourselves! And Scott had no idea that I couldn't sleep the few nights leading up to the appointment!! I could hardly wait to take Jackson to preschool (and not act too excited, he is as big of a blabber mouth as his dad!) and head to the clinic. I was even 20 minutes early and for anyone who knows me, knows that's a big deal! The technician took me in, started the ultrasound and asked right away if I wanted to know the gender and if I was hoping for one over the other. I told her, "Yes, please!!" And that we were hoping for one but I don't dare say which so I don't jinx it! Where she first placed the ultrasound wand was right where it needed to be and there was no mistake, she said, "Well, you're having a girl!!". Of course, I started bawling, and then asked if she was sure and that there could be no way it was a boy. She showed me exactly what she was looking at and confirmed it was a girl. I hadn't met with this technician before so I had to explain to her our situation and that these were tears of JOY!! When I finally came to, I had a million questions for her: is the placenta attached all around, is the umbilical cord firmly attached, had the fibroid on my right side grown, is her size on schedule and on and on. She was so good to check it all out and answer all my questions even though the baby was moving all over. And she also confirmed one of my fears, she's big! Or I should say tall as her weight was right where it needed to be but that she was already 2 inches longer than where she should be. My brothers wives all have had very big babies (9-10 pounders!) and I'm scared to death of childbirth not to mention a big one! I'm hoping at least she keeps on the path of her daddy's genes and remains thin and tall!

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Turns out, I did have to meet with the Dr. on Christmas Eve as he had to leave on a delivery when I was having the ultrasound done and couldn't do his checkup. I was kind of relieved as I hated having to "lie" to Scott. Even though it wouldn't be to check the gender, I still had to meet with the Dr on that day.

My brother and his family arrived from San Diego the next day and it was killing me to keep this secret. I think I slipped a few times and my SIL figured it out. I think it helped though to be able to tell someone as keeping it from Scott was a struggle.

On a side note, the nausea has ended. I used up all my IV supplies last week, took out the needle and crossed my fingers that it was over. It didn't return, yippeee!! That was a long run and for the first time, I was feeling good during my pregnancy. And other fun news, I can feel her moving, A LOT!!

December 19th - Happy 5th Birthday Jackson!

My baby is turning 5 today!! Where did the time go?!!! This had to be the easiest photo shoot we have ever had. Years past, he would have a hard time staying focused on the actual picture taking and wanted to play with all their props. But he did fantastic and as always, he looks so much older than he is. And as always, a big ham!!

It's really hard to believe that 5 years ago, today, we had gone to Scott's family Christmas party knowing that Dawn, Jackson's birthmom, had gone into labor that morning and anxiously waiting for Family Services to call to tell us he had been born. We didn't say anything to his family until the evening was starting to wrap up and right after we broke the news, FS called to say he had been born at 6:30 PM. He was due on the 29th so it was fun to know we were going to be able to bring him home before Christmas! It was a long two days before we went and got him on the 21st but I'm so happy that Dawn was able to spend that time with him before she placed him in our arms.

Jackson has been such a blessing in our lives. We never imagined then after 10 years of marriage what this little baby would bring to our family. He has always been a happy, expressive, inquisitive and sweet little boy. He doesn't go a day without telling us he loves us. And he's smart, too smart!! As well as active!! And to believe this kid is not into sugar, I've never had a picture on his birthday of him eating his cake because he doesn't like it!

I've really noticed how much he has matured the past few months. I couldn't be happier with the timing of our next addition. He is so excited for the baby and I know he will be such a big help. I can't say enough how much I love this boy! Happy Birthday Jackson!

Week 18 - Dec 7 - Sleep, The New Challenge

So, in reading the pregnancy books, since week 16, I should now only be sleeping on my side and not on my back. It's been very difficult for me as I find my back is the most comfortable. It's so strange to sleep on my side and my belly falls to whatever side I'm on. I've noticed my hips and back have been getting achy and I'm feeling them separating a bit. I haven't slept real well for several months now anyway. I have to get up and go to the bathroom sometimes 5-6 times a night (thanks to the IV hydration!). I'm always so paranoid that what I do will hurt the baby and it's been a real anxiety for me! I've tried a body pillow but it's too bulky. Any secrets anyone?

I'm also a bit concerned that I haven't felt the baby move yet. Again those evil pregnancy books say you should start feeling movement between 16 and 20 weeks. Although first timers will feel it more toward 20 weeks and because I'm still a bit overweight it will be more so that way. Come on baby, move!

Good news though - it has finally snowed in Utah County! I LOVE the snow (you can take the girl out of South Dakota, but can't take South Dakota out of the girl! And these Utah snowstorms can't hold a candle to the snow we get in South Dakota!). My little bro and his family are coming for Christmas from San Diego. They both were raised with white Christmas's and was looking forward to the snow. I was starting to stress that we wouldn't have it this year! I'm so happy! Bring on the white stuff!

Week 17 - Four Down, Five to Go!

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Still on the IV. I've had a few days where I had to take the needle out and couldn't get in to the hospital to get it changed because it was the weekend and the nausea returned. I'm really hoping that I won't have to stay on it through the whole pregnancy and I would like to enjoy it some of the time!

But I'll take it as it comes!